Having the ability to be home with your kids can be a blessing. Being home can also be one of the hardest jobs you’ll ever have. They say the days are long and the years are short. Some days can feel really long when you are a stay at home mom. As someone who came from heavy duty, structured career to being at home with my kids it was a major transition. I assume it might be the case for most moms who decide to stay home. After being home four years here are five tips that have helped me get through those long days. See my five tips below:
1 – Schedule Your Days
Having a planned schedule and routine can make a huge difference in the switch to becoming a stay at home mom. It can be easy to fall into patterns without structure. For me, I tend to get depressed if I don’t leave the house and get out in the world. You can see more about dealing with postpartum depression here. It’s good to sign up for weekly classes with your kids (also a great way to meet other moms). Having a set daily schedule is healthy for your kids as well. We do meals and naps at the same time almost every day which allows me to plan out our schedules. Another tip I like is using a paper planner that shows one week at a time. I list a few of my favorite productivity tips in this post.
2 – Dedicate Time For Your Passions
When you spend most of your hours taking care of others it can be tricky to find time to set aside for yourself. I never forget my mom telling me she felt like she lost some of herself and her identity when staying home with us. As a result, I’ve committed to carving out time to stick with the passions I had before kids. This has made a huge difference for me personally. I’m a classical vocalist and sang for years. Even when my son was just a few months old I joined a semi-professional choir and a business group. Making the time was not easy, but dedicating some of my time to these helped me have some dedicated time away to focus on my unique interests.
3 – Find and Commit to Your Best Methods for Self Care
You are getting pulled in so many directions there might be days where getting in a shower might seem hard (let alone practicing self-care). My point here is trying to find a way to fit in at least a little self-care (whatever that means for you). It could be taking your baby on a hike or a run. For me, I had to find a gym that has built-in daycare so I could work out. Sometimes self care as a mom requires far out planning to get some childcare so you can get a haircut or something else that helps you feel good. Sometimes for me it feels easier to stay home then go out and get my haircut (or I love to make excuses to not go to the gym), but I always feel better if take the time to take care of myself.
4 – Connect With a Mom Network
This one is important and not something that I valued early on as a mom. Finding a group of moms who are in a similar position as you can be immensely helpful. Having a solid network of moms you’ll find great resources for all kinds of information. Being home can feel alienating and having a group where you know others are going through being a parent of young children. Most places have some type of moms groups, learning and development classes or even online FB groups are good resources.
5 – Don’t be too Hard on Yourself
As a mom it’s inevitable you’ll have thoughts of “I’m not a good enough Mom,” or “What did I get done today.” Sometimes getting your kids fed and keeping them alive for the day is about all you can accomplish and that is ok! Somedays mine don’t get out their jammies and eat eggos for dinner. OK sometimes I don’t get out of my jammies and eat waffles for dinner as well. The core message is you are most likely doing better than you think – don’t be too hard on yourself. You’ve got this mama! I’ll leave it with a great quote from Rachel Hollis.
Being a perfect mom is a myth – but being a pretty great mom, most of the time, is actually possible.
Rachel Hollis
Thanks for reading – would love to hear your comments or questions below.
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